Daddies and daughters.

Ingrid Schlueter has hit the nail on the head with her article Daddies and Daughters.

Her piece should serve as a reminder to all fathers that even success in something as important as ministry should not come at the expense of your children. What endeavor, career, or goal in life could be more important than capturing your daughter’s heart?

Here’s an excerpt from Ingrid’s article:

“Buried under the eye-liner, body-piercings, provocative clothing and exhibitionist behavior of so many girls today are sad hearts and souls, weeping for a daddy who never cared.”

You can read the entire article (which I highly encourage you to do) here.

9 thoughts on “Daddies and daughters.

  1. March 17th 2010, a former atheist, after sharing his testimony, spoke of his daughter’s appreciation for how God changed him, and made him the “daddy she was praying for”. This so completely broke me, after feeling the Holy Spirit’s conviction through his testimony, having at that time a 2 year old daughter myself. I was made intimately aware what I had been doing to God, and subsequently was made aware of what I was doing to my daughter, being separated from The Living God in my depravity. God has blessed me by bringing me the only child I have, Ilana, and used my own child as the catalyst for my true salvation in Christ. This message is food for my soul today. Thank you Pilgrim (and Ingrid). Thank you Father.


  2. Guilt trip. Without so much as a scriptural place to give examples from, and there are plenty in the bible, this is another warm, fuzzy, albeit completely true piece. Why not examine Rachel, Leah, the daughter who was brought back to life? One could just as easily substitute Mother for Father, or Son for Daughter in the piece with the same result.

    “What endeavor, career, or goal in life could be more important than capturing your daughter’s heart?”
    How about the Gospel itself, which we and our stories are not? What Christ did, and the great love he showed dwarfs any effort we have to correct what we are doing wrong in our lives. And their are billions in danger of perishing every day without him.


  3. This was a blessing. Thanks

    God always surprises me in how He orchestrates things. My daughter was just starting school when our son was born. So, in an effort to help me, my husband began taking my daughter to school. My daughter loved her daddy taking her to school mainly because my husband is more timely than I am and my daughter would get in extra socializing with her friends. My husband grew so fond of their time together that he continued to take her until she started driving. Honestly, the first day she drove herself to school was very difficult on my husband because he knew he would never again get that precious time to be with her. Needless to say it forged a very strong relationship between them.

    Blessings, charisse


  4. Michael Henry,
    No girl wants your “gospel” if you as a father are a) AWOL b.) a flaming hypocrite who drapes yourself in pride while proclaiming your “Jesus” c.) an idolater who puts something before your family. I am a girl, you are not. I can tell you flat out that you abandon your fatherly responsibilities at your and her spiritual peril. Causing little ones to stumble was warned about by Christ himself. If that’s “feel good” writing, than so be it.

    P.S. The use of the term girl was in reference to the fact that I once was one, 😉


  5. Michael,

    Finding fault seems to be your expertise. Allow me to find fault with you.

    1) “Guilt trip.”
    What is the point of this statement? Unless you have something to feel guilty about (ie, neglecting your children), this post is not guilt inducing. Rather, it is a needed reminder for all fathers that loving a daughter, or neglecting to, can make all the difference in her life. You can’t love your children too much.

    And as for easily substituting mother or son, this no doubt is true. But Ingrid was writing specifically about daughters because she is and was a daughter, and not a son. Feel free to write a post at any time about sons.

    2) “Without so much as a scriptural place to give examples from…”
    Why, exactly, are scriptural examples necessary for Ingrid’s statements to ring true? Biblical examples often serve a purpose, but they are not strictly necessary, especially when I dare say we all have enough examples from our own lives to fit the bill.

    3) “What about the gospel…”
    Simply, parents are to live the gospel. No amount of preaching will change the dramatic effect of a life lived for Jesus, or on the contrary, a life lived for self. In fact, preaching without loving your family will do more harm than loving your family without preaching could ever possibly do.


  6. Michael,
    I can tell you firsthand having a father who was negligent and a drunkard greatly affected my as a young girl. He never was a part of my life, his life was based around him. How did I turn out? I chose homosexuality for a number of years until God saved me. I understand my choices are my own responsibility, but I do believe the lack of a father figure greatly affected me.

    Mothers and fathers are not interchangeable in the rearing of children, they both have crucial roles in molding and shaping the child. If you disagree, just look at our society today.


  7. I’m guilty, I admit it.
    I have two sons and one daughter.
    She’s a “middle” child, so she gets it from both sides.
    God is gracious though.
    He’s blessed me with a now-15-year-old-young-woman (a.k.a. my little Munchkin) having a tender conscience, a quiet spirit, a strong work-ethic, honesty, a love for little children, and a fearless approach to life and telling others about the Lord.
    She’s a lot like her Mom.
    I married “up.”
    Bless the Lord.



  8. @ Michael:
    Your whole comment came across as very condescending. That is too bad because I understand what you were trying to say but coming right out the gate with “guilt trip” puts everyone off from hearing the rest of your message (which kept the condescending tone you started with).

    I understand the place of the Gospel of Christ and its importance in our lives and this post was not meant to diminish that in any way, I just took it for granted that those who read this blog know the importance we place on the Gospel. Just as I took that for granted, I also erred by considering it a foregone conclusion that Christians would understand that God doesn’t call us to sacrifice the souls of our own children on the altar of ministry (something I struggle with greatly to keep in focus).

    “He was a great minister . . . too bad he spent no time evangelizing his own kids and they perished.”

    Now for everyone else I leave you with one more warm and fuzzy guilt trip:


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