The Wonder of the Mirror

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Things are not always as they appear. Sometimes, appearances can be very deceiving. That was true the day the knock came on the mirror and the horror that came with realizing that somebody would have to answer.

The preceding days held nothing ominous. If there had been an inkling of an idea that something was amiss, then I would have done everything in my power to prevent things from happening. But then again, in hindsight, I am not sure that I would. Changing the inevitable does not always bring a modicum of joy or happiness. Getting our way would actually be a miserable existence.

The actual morning dawned. As usual, it was beautiful. The sun rose around the world, but by nightfall things would be very different. The problem was that I knew about the mirror but I was too young and naïve to think that it could ever affect me.

Preparing for work, I began to feel some odd twinges, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Opening the door, I said goodbye to the family but was stopped when the phone rang. It was not unexpected and I was in no hurry, so I answered. In my mind, I think I knew before I responded, but the mirror glared back at me. I dropped my gaze first as I listened to the voice on the other end.

“Hello, I need you to meet me at the hospital. There is nothing to worry about, but I would be quick just in case.”

To this day, I cannot remember whether I responded in a courteous fashion or not. The caller informed me though that they would be there waiting for me. What I can recall is exceeding the speed limit on several major roads. A trip that should have taken about 15 minutes, I made in less than 10 with change to spare.

Only one ambulance was in the bay as I ran through the doors marked EMERGENCY. All decorum was absent as I blindly stumbled to the nurse’s station. As I approached the desk, one of my senses did not fail me. My hearing has always been excellent and today was no exception.

I introduced myself to the nurses and I noticed them looking oddly at each other when I gave my name. One of them stood to her feet and asked me to come and wait for the doctor to finish. As soon as he was free, he would come and let me know what was happening. Sitting down in the waiting room, nothing seemed out of the ordinary except for the mirrored glass that covered almost one entire wall.

After what seemed like an eternity, I grew impatient. Standing to my feet, I opened the door of the waiting room and went back to the nurses’ station.

“Hi, I am sure the doctor is busy, but I would really like some information. May I just go back to the examination room?”

“Sir, we just got word from the doctor and he said he should be up to speak with you in just a matter of minutes. Please wait for him in the room.”

Walking slowly back to the room, I opened the door and stepped in. Closing it back behind me, something back to nag at me as I stared at my dim reflection in the mirrored glass.

When time stands still, it is impossible to give an accurate description of a timeline. In my case, the next few minutes took another eternity while I pondered my location. As soon as my mind went through a myriad of possible computations, I came to a stark conclusion.

First, there was nobody in the room with me. There were always people in the Emergency Room. Not but a couple of weeks before, I had brought one of my children to the same hospital because they had fallen out of bed and split their head open requiring stitches.

Second, this waiting room had a door on it and while I had seen several people walk by who were not staff members, nobody had entered my waiting room.

Third, just as my brain realized that I was clearly in the wrong room, the doctor entered with another individual by his side. It was an older woman and she did not have a lab coat on. In fact, the only thing that I could focus on was the lapels of her jacket. Both lapels held a small, almost inconspicuous piece of jewelry that had been fashioned in the shape of a cross.

The doctor sat down at my left hand and the woman with the emblem on her lapels sat immediately to my right. Neither of them sat back in leisure, but were on the edge of their seats looking at me.

The room began to spin and I realized that my heart was not prepared for what the doctor began to say.

“Sir, I am sorry, but there was nothing we could do! We tried everything, but your brother is gone!”

That beautiful morning turned black. I knew that a knock from the other side of eternity had taken my brother from what C.S. Lewis called the Shadowlands of earth into the brightness of heaven where there is no night, no tears, and no death.

Each taking a hand, they walked me back to the exam room. My heart still aches as I remember looking down on the still face of my 22 year old brother, John. The pictures will always be in my mind of that day along with the torture of the funeral preparations. He was my best friend. No friends, no co-workers, and no family had yet joined me, and I felt more alone than I have done at just about any other point in my life.

Unbeknownst to us, he had developed a virus in his heart. Less than a year after getting out of the military with a clean bill of health, his heart had simply exploded. We later learned the EMTs were already in the building just about six or seven steps away. Ironically, they had taken over helping a lady who was having an angina attack.

The only first aid certified individual in her office had been my brother. Giving the care over to the EMT staff, he had turned and walked over to his desk, sat down, and fallen over dead.

Somehow, I managed to go back to my home. It was my responsibility to bear the brunt of the emotions as I called my parents who lived overseas. I called my brothers and sisters and informed them in different parts of the country, but nothing would change the fact that eternity had come calling for my brother, and he had answered.

I would have to say that I would not want him to have to come back to this world of misery and woe. The land where he lives is a land beyond compare and he did not have to grow old while dealing with sickness and pain. As I look from this side of the mirror, I realize that there are shadows on the other side. At my age, they are growing closer now than they were 23 years ago when my brother was called.

Sadly, we can only see glimpses every now and then of the joys that lie beyond this mortal pale. One day, we too will hear a clear, distinct knock. However, when the knock comes for us, it will actually open and the door will be a welcome intrusion. For those we leave behind, they will mourn, but one day, they will be able to join us on the other side. We will see clearly and realize that our journey was designed to take us from the shadows into the most incredible clarity that we cannot currently imagine.

The thought of seeing what is on the other side is not as scary as it was 10, 20, or 30 years ago. There are times the unknown reflects back to us in ways we cannot comprehend. We know there is something there, but all we see is our own reflection. For now I must go, but I am trying to prepare harder for the knock on the mirror. Whether I like it or not, it is coming. I will be ready.

1 Corinthians 13:12, “For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face…”(ESV)

Do You Love Me, Father?

Do You love me, Father?
So much has happened…
It seems like trials come.
I fail so many times in life,
Regardless of what You’ve done

Do You love me, Father?
I see the wicked take control.
I know the time will come soon
When everything I say about You
Will probably be my doom

Do You love me, Father?
Those who have hurt me sore
Seem to get away with their sin.
They pretend to be one thing
Will they really win?

Do You love me, Father?
Why can’t I seem to do
The things I know I should?
Why do I hurt You, Lord
And do not the things I would?

Yes, You love me, Father.
I know the things I’m going through
Are to make me more like You.
I must suffer as a believer
Knowing You suffered for me, too.

Yes, You love me, Father.
Through these things I learn…
Faith, love, kindness, patience,
goodness, meekness, peace, and joy.
Yes, it makes so much more sense.

Yes, You love me, Father.
I thank You so much that You do.
I thank You for helping me grow
In so many different ways
You are making me to know…

YOU!

Violet Inez
September 26, 2017

One Person

When life feels like iron
And overwhelms the soul
When despair makes the heart yearn
And others seem so cold
When back comes no reply
From many who don’t care
There is only One Person
Who will always be there…

When the heartache presses down
On the thoughts endlessly
When the tears pour down the cheeks
From something said thoughtlessly
When those who should be concerned
Don’t really want to know
There is only One Person
Who will His grace show…

When the body is falling apart
And the heart no longer sings
When the tempest overflows the joy
And the soul sadness only brings
When the brokenness of the essence
Drives you to ragged despair
There is only One Person
Who will answer your prayer…

When a new day is dawning bright
And the heart looks to the Lord
When the mind finally remembers
And seeks to be restored
When the thoughts are finally brought
Under the Father’s ways and will
There is only One Person
Who will always be there still…

Violet Inez
7-12-2016

If You Love Me…Part 2

The last section we dealt with loving and obeying the Lord by obeying His Word. Now, let me hasten to add that obedience to the Lord should not cause us heartburn. 1 John talks about loving the Lord and chapter 5:1-3, “Whosoever believeth that Jesus is the Christ is born of God: and every one that loveth him that begat loveth him also that is begotten of him. By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God, and keep his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments: and his commandments are not grievous.”

It should be our joy to obey the Lord in all things. He is our Father and His great love for us should give us joy to know we please Him when we follow His will, not ours. If His commandments aren’t grievous to us then the joy should bound through our lives and within our hearts as we do His will.

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Does this mean we won’t experience heartache or that we have to paste a smile on our face and pretend we are something that we aren’t? Of course not! The tears of sorrow and heartbreak will flow for us as it does for unbelievers. The only difference is that the Lord will comfort us in the midst of our sorrows and heartache. He will give us peace while we continue on our earthly pilgrimage. You see, loving the Lord doesn’t mean that we always will do what is right.

The psalmist said in Psalm 37:23-24, “The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and He delighteth in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for He upholdeth him with His hand.”

The Lord is with us and will always be there to give us strength in His path. No matter how difficult the way may seem, it’s a lot easier than trying to make it without the Lord. Family and friends will fail but our love should be always on the Lord and following His will. In fact, some of the worst enemies can be those within our own household because they have to live with the guilt and shame of their own sin by watching us seeking to live a life pleasing to Him.

Yes, we will also fail at times and probably respond in ways that are ungodly and not Christ honoring but the difference should be seeking forgiveness despite our failure. Loving the Lord is not mere sentimentality that makes our hearts feel warm and fuzzy on a cold day. We are in the midst of a long, hard battle that won’t end in this life. Part of that battle is following the Lord’s will in every area of life. Put on the whole armor of God, not just part of it.

Psalm 73:25-26 give us a very clear understanding of what the Lord should be to us. “Whom have I in heaven but Thee? There is none upon earth that I desire beside Thee.” No matter what the thing or person is here on earth, no one and nothing should mean as much to us as the Lord, whether in heaven or earth. He is the only true God and worthy of all praise, honor, and glory! Love the Lord at all cost because He is the only One who can satisfy you!

Morning Devotional With Charles Spurgeon

January 19

“I sought him, but I found him not.” — Song of Solomon 3:1

Tell me where you lost the company of a Christ, and I will tell you the most likely place to find him. Have you lost Christ in the closet by restraining prayer? Then it is there you must seek and find him. Did you lose Christ by sin? You will find Christ in no other way but by the giving up of the sin, and seeking by the Holy Spirit to mortify the member in which the lust doth dwell.

Did you lose Christ by neglecting the Scriptures? You must find Christ in the Scriptures. It is a true proverb, “Look for a thing where you dropped it, it is there.” So look for Christ where you lost him, for he has not gone away. But it is hard work to go back for Christ. Bunyan tells us, the pilgrim found the piece of the road back to the Arbour of Ease, where he lost his roll, the hardest he had ever travelled. Twenty miles onward is easier than to go one mile back for the lost evidence.

spurgeonreadings

Take care, then, when you find your Master, to cling close to him. But how is it you have lost him? One would have thought you would never have parted with such a precious friend, whose presence is so sweet, whose words are so comforting, and whose company is so dear to you! How is it that you did not watch him every moment for fear of losing sight of him?

Yet, since you have let him go, what a mercy that you are seeking him, even though you mournfully groan, “O that I knew where I might find him!” Go on seeking, for it is dangerous to be without thy Lord. Without Christ you are like a sheep without its shepherd; like a tree without water at its roots; like a sere leaf in the tempest-not bound to the tree of life. With thine whole heart seek him, and he will be found of thee: only give thyself thoroughly up to the search, and verily, thou shalt yet discover him to thy joy and gladness.

Would That We Had Died in Egypt

“And the people of Israel said to them, ‘Would that we had died by the hand of the LORD in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the meat pots and ate bread to the full, for you have brought us out into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger’” (Exodus 16:3).

“Why is the LORD bringing us into this land, to fall by the sword? Our wives and our little ones will become a prey. Would it not be better for us to go back to Egypt?” (Numbers 14:3).

It’s interesting to me how much we tend to think we know better than God. “Oh, that we had died in Egypt instead of being brought into this wilderness to die?” (As if those were the only options.) “Back then we had food to eat and a roof over our heads.” (Forget that we were being controlled and beaten and treated cruelly and that God led us out in response to our cries for help.) I think the problem is that we try to figure God out when, in reality, God’s ways are not our ways. He is not obligated to tell us His plans. Our job is to trust Him.

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You may not realize it but grumbling is a sin. It is being ungrateful for what He has given you. It is easy to fall into this trap, but important that you do not.

I’ve walked with God long enough to know that His plans are good. He does not bring you through the wilderness to kill you. Everything that happens is for your good and His glory. If you keep moving forward and refrain from fainting, you will one day reach the Promised Land.

Don’t keep pining for the days when you had friends, “fun,” money, whatever. Those days weren’t as glorious as you may remember them to be. It’s walking with God that brings peace, joy, and contentment. If you are not experiencing that, there is something you still need to surrender. I implore you to do that today. Repent for your ingratitude and ask God to fill your heart with thanksgiving. He is truly faithful.

His Robes For Mine

The glorious work of what Christ has done for me can overwhelm the heart and soul. That God was estranged from God cannot be truly comprehended. Just as great is the truth that this beggar had Somebody to die in my stead so that I would be able to stand faultless before the Father.

All because of Christ and Christ alone!